My friend Maury Siskel is a retired scientist living in Texas, but we share communications daily - he sends me stuff everyday - all day. Most of his communications involve serious stuff that I appreciate and quite often use, so I'm greatful for those leads. This is especially appreciated because we share a number of things. We share views on science, economics, social dynamics and we've another thing in common ..... we're old.
Maury has a way of finding humorous stuff about old age that old people will appreciate. Here's a partial list of what Maury and Dog found and sent over the weekend.
- I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out of the way much faster now.
- Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.
- I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.
- I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.
- Old age is coming at a really bad time.
- When I was a child I thought "Nap Time" was a punishment. Now, as a grownup, it feels like a small vacation.
- The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."
- I don't have gray hair; I have "wisdom highlights." I'm just very wise.
- If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would've put them on my knees.
- Why do I have to press one for English when you're just gonna transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
- Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.
- At my age "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I came in there for.
Have a good week everyone!
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