This is a decision we are repeatedly faced with...
Those of us who believe that citizens can make a difference are often faced with a conundrum. Since we clearly can’t solve everything, when an important issue comes up in conversation, etc., the question is: a) should we shut up and look the other way, or b) should we speak up?
{Note: for a refresher on Beliefs, see my earlier three-part discussion.}
Taking a position on many common topics will likely alienate quite a few people. In some cases in might be as high as 90%. In this simple explanation we’ll assume that on average, 50% of listeners will be turned off by a person expressing their beliefs on certain subjects.
So if we start with 100 possible friends, and then we express our candid opinions about a variety of topics, this is how many friends will be left when the smoke clears (note that these topics are randomly arranged)…
- Politics: 100 —> 50
- Climate Change: 50 —> 25
- Energy matters: 25 —> 12
- Education: 12 —> 6
- Economics, investing, financial management: 6 —> 3
- Religion: 3 —> 2
- Family life: 2 —> 1
Numerous other topics can also reduce the quantity of “friends” we’re left with after expressing our views (e.g., sports, sex, health issues, etc.).
Regretfully we live in a time of intolerance and polarization, so the reality is that many potential friends will be annoyed/turned off/ etc. about our opinions on one or more of these subjects. The result is that most of those people will then pull back from a relationship with us because of some reservations they have about us (due to those select views).
What can be exasperating is that there are quite a few people will react negatively even if you are in agreement on eight out of ten items, just because of the other two!
If our objective is to maximize our associates, what are our options?
Probably the best way to keep “friends” is to avoid discussing anything remotely controversial.
A second strategy is to publicly take a noncommittal neutral position on hot topics.
A third tactic is to get your “friend” to express themselves first — and then agree with whatever they say.
A fourth idea is from a famous quote from Ronald Regan. He said that if you disagree with 98% of what an associate says, just talk about the 2% you are in agreement with…
In analyzing this conundrum a Critically Thinking person would likely conclude:
a) you have to decide which is more important to you: to be true to your own beliefs, or to get approval from others?
b) if your beliefs are easily swayed by another person’s opinion or disapproval, you should be giving more thought to the basis of your beliefs.
c) if an individual disassociates themselves from you because you stick to your guns regarding your beliefs, how good a friend would they have been anyway?
So the answer as to whether to Speak up or Shut up is based on your convictions and priorities.
BTW, my perspective is that we don’t need a lot of friends to make a difference. This is eloquently stated by Margaret Mead: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.”
Here are other materials by this scientist that you might find interesting:
Check out the Archives of this Critical Thinking substack.
WiseEnergy.org: discusses the Science (or lack thereof) behind our energy options.
C19Science.info: covers the lack of genuine Science behind our COVID-19 policies.
Election-Integrity.info: multiple major reports on the election integrity issue.
Media Balance Newsletter: a free, twice-a-month newsletter that covers what the mainstream media does not do, on issues from COVID to climate, elections to education, renewables to religion, etc. Here are the Newsletter’s 2024 Archives. Please send me an email to get your free copy. When emailing me, please make sure to include your full name and the state where you live. (Of course, you can cancel the Media Balance Newsletter at any time - but why would you?
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