Fleeing Californians Ponder Which State to Ruin Next

By Nick Taxia / 5 February 2013 / 29 Comments

The following piece is satire, January 29th, 2013,

The two Sacramento natives and college sweethearts have lived in California their entire lives.   Now their lifelong stay in the Sunshine state is sadly coming to an end….[they] lament being only an estimated 250,000 people who are now leaving California annually….They also lament not having fully experienced the hippie heyday of the state, being only in their pre-teen years at the time California began officially transforming from a self-sustaining state into the basket case of welfare–driven, tax and regulation-plagued, socialist, Iraq-sized, insane dung pile it is today…….But in leaving California the duo are now faced with a new dilemma: which state to ruin next?  “It’s like, so trippy,” ….. “We’ve voted as progressively as possible in every election since our twenties, and yet things are worse than ever.  It’s, like, so bizarre.”……. [as they] seek to flee the state they helped to ruin, only to relocate to a freer state and/or city they will ruin all over again, given time.    It’s not exactly like ‘locusts,’ but they’re pretty darn close.   People like [them] move to a state, breed, and in time vote for people who raise their taxes and enact a litany of regulations and ridiculous bans.  And after they come to suffer from the very politicians who enact these choking laws, they decide it’s too much for them, and so move elsewhere.”…More “Satire” Here…..